When we’re getting ready for a trip with kids, most of us go into full packing mode. We’re making lists, double-checking bags, and trying to think through every possible scenario.
Snacks? Packed.
Activities? Packed.
Backup outfits, medicines, chargers, comfort items? Packed.
We spend so much time thinking about what our kids will need to survive a trip but rarely stop to think about what we need.
My first trip traveling with my baby, I was flying from New York City to San Diego. I had written out an entire packing list including all the things I needed to bring for her. I had so much stuff for the baby, I could barely carry it all. It took up almost an entire suitcase. When I got to San Diego and opened my bag, I realized I forgot almost all of my own clothes. I had one pair of jeans, one extra shirt, and that's about it. My mind was completely focused on everything my baby needed and nothing for myself.
Ultimately, it was fine because I could buy the things I forgot. But there's been other times that trips with kids feel hard. And the truth is, the thing that makes or breaks a trip with kids usually isn’t what’s in your suitcase.
It’s who you bring with you. I've felt the pull to want to try to find my "village" of friends before and I'm so grateful I found people who we love to spend time and travel with. It definitely takes work to find those people. But it's so worth it.
Finding Your Village Isn’t Always Easy (But It’s Worth It)
The hard part is that finding those people, the ones who truly align with you, doesn’t always happen naturally.
It can take time. Effort. Trial and error. And as adults, it’s not always easy to build those kinds of friendships from scratch.
A wise friend once told me she feels like it takes at least 2 years before you really start to feel like you make friends in a new place. That sounded so long to me, but she said it to remind me to not feel discouraged when I didn't find people I clicked with in the first few months of moving to a new place. After living in multiple places over the years- Utah, California, Texas, Connecticut, and back to California, I can say she's right. It can be quick to find friends that you enjoy spending time with, but to really form those deeper connections, I've found that it takes time and experiences and chances to go through seasons together to really form deeper bonds. And that takes time. So that 2 year time span was a great gauge for me as I started to get to know people in my community.
Why I Love the Idea Behind The Village
This is exactly why I love what The Village app is creating. Compatible families are everywhere. The hardest part has always been finding them. The Village takes something that can feel really hard (finding your people) and makes it easier and more intentional.
Instead of hoping you happen to meet the right families, The Village app helps you find your people based on the things that actually matter: your values, your parenting style, your lifestyle, even your personality. And it’s not just one parent doing all the social work. Both you and your partner become part of the same circle of families, building real friendships alongside your kids. So when you do build those relationships, you’re starting from a place of real compatibility.
And that’s what turns into the kind of real-life friendships you actually want to travel with.
The kind where everyone has a friend.
The kind where support is built in.
The kind that makes trips feel lighter, easier, and more fun.
If you feel that pull to start finding families who genuinely get you, the kind where both you and your partner have people you actually click with and your kids have built-in best friends, check out The Village app here.
The Difference Between a Trip… and a Vacation
There’s a very real difference between traveling with kids and actually feeling like you’re on vacation with them.
If you’ve done both, you know. One feels like parenting, just in a different location.
The other somehow feels lighter, more fun, and actually enjoyable. And for us, that difference almost always comes down to one thing:
Whether or not we have our people with us.
Years ago we were visiting Coeur d'Alene, Idaho. As incredibly beautiful as it is there, it is probably one of my least favorite trips. Everything just felt hard. The kids were young and were thrown off their schedules, everyone felt grumpy with lack of sleep, the hotel didn't turn out like we planned, the plans for the day went awry, it seriously just felt like nothing was going right. It felt like I was just parenting somewhere else with no feeling of "vacation fun" ever. My husband and I felt drained and exhausted at the end of the day. I think we need a re-do of our trip there, because I've learned so much since those first days of traveling with kids.
When it’s just you handling everything like long days, tired kids, and disrupted routines, it can feel exhausting no matter how beautiful the destination is.
But when you have a village with you? Everything shifts.
What Parents Actually Need on Trips (That We Don’t Pack)
We’re so focused on preparing for our kids that we forget to prepare for ourselves.
We don’t pack support, backup, or someone who understands what you’re going through. And those are the things that make the biggest difference.
Travel with kids is a lot. The days are long. The routines are off. Everyone is a little more tired, a little more emotional, a little more out of sync. And when you’re doing that alone, it can feel overwhelming.
I vividly remember one time when we were traveling in Hawaii, all of the kids were young (6 and under) and the hot Hawaiian sun and nonstop beach days wore them out. We were on a hike with them and about 30 minutes into the hike they all completely shut down. They were exhausted and just wanted to go home. The problem was, we still had a 30 minute hike back to the parking lot. My husband and I were outnumbered and didn't have enough arms to carry them all. I remember wishing we had friends with us because it's such an easy distraction for the kids to have friends to laugh and play with on the hike. It would have gone so much smoother.
But when you’re with the right group of people, families who get it, who are in the same stage of life, who parent in similar ways, it doesn’t feel so heavy. You’re not doing it alone anymore.
When Everyone Has a Friend, Everything Feels Easier
One of the biggest things I’ve noticed when we travel with other families is how much happier everyone is. The kids have built-in best friends. They’re playing, exploring, entertaining each other. They’re not relying on you for every moment of connection or stimulation. And we, as parents, get something too. We get our people.
We get conversation, connection, laughter and those little moments that remind you that you’re not just a parent, you’re a person too.
One of our favorite trips was when we went to Wyoming with two other families. All of the kids were good friends with an age range from 2 to 10. There were 10 kids total, and they all played so happily, mixing their different ages and coming up with new games to play. The parents are all good friends and we were able to hang with each other and chat while the kids played almost all day. We took the kids to lots of different activities and places, kayaking on lakes, bowling, riding horses, and more. It was as fun for the adults as it was for the kids because everyone felt like they had a friend. Even the parents. There was less fighting, less "I'm bored," and we found that all the kids rose to things that were challenging for them because they had friends to cheer them on. Multiple times on that trip all the parents said how magical this trip felt.
It becomes this win-win dynamic where the kids are happier, the parents are happier, and the whole trip feels more balanced. And suddenly, it starts to feel a little bit more like a vacation.
The Kind of Support You Can’t Replicate Alone
There’s something really powerful about traveling with people who truly understand your season of life. The unspoken things. The chaos. The meltdowns. The constant needs.
When you’re with the right families, there’s no pressure to be perfect. No need to explain. No judgment. Instead, there’s this quiet support system that naturally forms.
Someone grabs snacks for all the kids.
Someone keeps an eye on the group while you step away for a minute.
Someone else jumps in without being asked.
One of my favorite memories of traveling with our friends in Costa Rica was how we were able to split up responsibilities with the kids. My youngest was 6 months at the time and was still needing to nap multiple times a day. He was pretty good at napping on the go, but one day he was just wiped and needed a solid, long nap at home. I was so grateful my friend was able to step in and take the older kids out to swim at the pool while I stayed with the baby and let him have a good reset nap. Instead of feeling torn on what to do (give the baby what he needed or give the big kids a fun experience), I was so grateful to have another mom there to give me back up with the kids.
It’s not structured. It’s not forced. It just happens when you’re with people who get it.
Your Travel Experience Isn’t Just What You Pack, It’s Who You Bring
We put so much energy into curating the things we bring on trips.
But the reality is, the right people can make a hard day feel manageable. They can turn stressful moments into funny memories. And they can take a trip that feels overwhelming and more joyful.
A few years ago we went to Florida with our friends and took the kids to Disney World. A trip like that can feel SO overwhelming with kids, especially at a theme park. Before the trip, the other mom and I sat down and put all our notes and ideas and to-do lists together to come up with some plans for the days. We coordinated what to pack to help make the days easier with the kids, who would do grocery runs to grab stuff for breakfast at the hotel, etc. Having someone else to split the plans with made it feel so much less stressful going into the trip. It also helped change the whole vibe of the trip. Everyone was much less stressed because we all shared the responsibility of the trip.
The Trips That Feel Different
At the end of the day, the best trips we’ve taken as a family haven’t just been about where we went. They’ve been about who we were with.
Because when you bring the right people with you, you’re not just managing a trip. You’re creating something that actually feels like a vacation. And that’s something no packing list can give you.